« To the past
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Feb 29, 2012
I choose to see happy accidents and coincidences as my subconscious predicting the future.
Feb 22, 2012
Inside sources say The Smurfs DVD will include a deleted scene, omitted because producers thought it “too offensive,” where the Smurfs do a redface routine.
Jan 30, 2012
700th Post
Like a good person, I try to practice empathy as much as possible. I do it because it’s a step toward my ultimate goal of omnipresence.
Jan 25, 2012
Since The Artist is such a popular film, they’re going to make a video game version exclusively for the Atari 2600.
Jan 20, 2012
The Adventures of Hypochondriac Man
- Hypochondriac Man: "Worrying about my panic attacks gives me anxiety attacks, and worrying about my anxiety attacks gives me..."
- Competent Doctor: "Let me guess: panic attacks."
- Hypochondriac Man: "If only. Anal fissures!"
Jan 16, 2012
It’s difficult to determine the age at which to tell children that Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. isn’t real.
Jan 11, 2012
What some call schizophrenia, I see as reality in stereo.
Jan 8, 2012
I just watched the best parts of Clip Show: The Movie.
Jan 6, 2012
Poor Compliment
“If you had herpes, I’d let you give me herpes.”
Jan 5, 2012
After watching Death Race, Death Race 2, and Death Race 2000, I’ve concluded none of these movies about zombies fighting for equal rights.
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About
My goal is absurd humor worded eloquently.
I'm Kevin Quattrocchi. I write jokes and post them. It'd be beneficial for everyone involved if you enjoy them, but you don't have to. I don't post photos or songs or reblogs. The layout is deliberately unimpressive, the jokes are so accidentally.
Twitter: twitter.com/AnalSatire Subscribe via RSS.
I'm Kevin Quattrocchi. I write jokes and post them. It'd be beneficial for everyone involved if you enjoy them, but you don't have to. I don't post photos or songs or reblogs. The layout is deliberately unimpressive, the jokes are so accidentally.
Twitter: twitter.com/AnalSatire Subscribe via RSS.
